If you read this, even if you don't know me, or even if you know I don't know you read this...please comment on my poetry (ah! what a scary thing to say!). I like writing poetry, I am compelled to learn more about it, to become better at writing it and to find a way to use it to share what God is teaching me about...everything...and nothing all at the same time. But, if they're crappy (no comments on that point, mom, I know what you are thinking... :) ) people need to tell me, or if some point is heavy handed...I need to know. Right now, you are my only teachers. So, please instruct! But...maybe gently?!? :)
Fresh, from tonight....
"Tuning Up"
brilliant cacophony
of sound
bursts onto the scene
of everyday ordinaryness-
like the first shaft
of sunbeams
at 5:45 this morning.
they had spread garishly
across a once night sky
and warmed us
to the coming
brilliant sun-
like the wakening instruments
of a community concert
whose every discordant scale
promises harmonious happiness.
2 comments:
did you know that my minor in college was writing? yeah, a split between technical writing and creative writing (of all weird combinations). i loved creative writing but i figured that it wouldn't get me as far in life as a focus in technical writing. so i took one more technical writing class than i did creative writing, which officially made my focus technical writing on paper. with all that said, i'll pretend like what i say matters. :)
your language is poignant and the imagery is concise. it's pretty dreamy and very lovely at the same time. i love the parallels between sound and light. it's my favorite kind of poetry really, not a ton of words, but bursting with imagery. well done, friend.
PS. best word verification ever. in order to post my comment it made me retype the word "poodog"
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